Today can consider is my first batch of trainees' passing out ceremony.. Yet i always miss out all the joyful occasion.. due to other works on hand or falling sick.. just recently that i able to think of is the Relay Run which group photos is taken but without me.. well, i was on course and unable to attend.. next is my boss changing of command parade.. again, i miss it as i was on high fever.. now is my guys ceremony and still unable to make it as i need to settle other works in tuas.. by the time i return back, the ceremony is over.. the reception is done.. nothing is been left over except me.. i was been left out..
Sometime, i really do ponder hard.. do i really belong to where i am now? I never seems to be in any part of the joyful occasions as there always something held me back.. What does it really means? Does it hinting that i should quit and leave early before the end of my contract? But i do love my job.. just that i not quite like the way the management done yet i still love my job alot.. Recently, i heard news that we are able to extend our contract but subject to approval.. is that a good news or bad? I'm in confusion now..
In fact, I'm quite a simple person.. all I'm asking is a stable income.. a small family with her.. able to provide her a good life.. that is all i hoping for.. but due to the future of my works.. i have no much ideas as deep down, i do want to continue my job as i love it but I'm not a high flyer, yet rather, I'm quite low profile.. as they only recognise my weakness instead of my strong point.. perhaps i don't have any strong point for them..
Today is Mooncake festival.. and the moon is up high full bloom and bright.. she keep saying she wanted to eat mooncakes but there isn't any.. as those i got for her is no longer on the table.. i won't say much of the details.. anyway, what i trying to say over here is that i got her mooncake for today to let her enjoy it on this festival..