Woke up early in the morning.. in fact, i didn't really sleep much as i couldn't really sleep nor eat.. it have been this way the past few days.. weird things is i doesn't feel tired at all.. but rather my mind is very active with her in it.. rush to buy my new keyboard which cost 400++ before heading to work.. well, during the whole day at work.. my mind is still all about her.. almost a week or perhaps i can say is a week.. since Sunday till now.. wanted so much to hear from her.. to hold and hug her.. to look at her one more time in her eyes.. but i know it won't be coming true.. she doesn't love me.. not to mention of missing me.. she did told me she happy with her life.. i keep remind myself not to message her, not to call her.. but
every time i took out my phone from my pocket, i will wanted so much to contact her.. but i tried to distract myself to look through the messages she sent.. the pictures we took.. and the two favourite video clip of us.. only by doing it.. will somehow buy more time.. by the time
i'm done and free to message her, i have new things on my hands for work again.. she will know how i feel now if she read my blog but i guess she won't, as she busy keeping company with Mike.. I really miss her badly.. I treated her like my wife.. pamper her, love her but ended up she lost the feeling for me.. Have i done not enough for her? I just wish to have one more chance to share her joys and sorrows not as a friend but as a lover.. but i can't let her know as she will be feeling irritate.. time will let her feeling fade away faster.. but for me, it will make me love her even more.. looking at couples on the street or in the car.. i feel so envy for them.. If there is a better gal out there for me.. it will only be her.. In fact, through this relationship, she had let me tasted truth love.. truth love doesn't end when a relationship ended.. it will be the
beginning of it. I will wait for her return.. even if it take my whole life waiting.. even if she doesn't love me.. even if she found someone new.. till the day is too much to bear..
i'll just
collapse. Below is a poem i wrote... weather is cold today.. hope she didn't catch a cold..
MYMy hands are empty.. My soul is lonely..My love is gone.. My heart is shattered.My mind is blank.. My feeling is numb..My tears dried up.. My world had stopped.But time doesn't stop, the world keep moving..People won't bother, nobody will care..Memories will stay, my love will too..Till my last breath, I will just keep waiting for you..
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home